Thursday, December 2nd started out somewhat uneventful. I got up and got ready for my weekly midwife appointment. On the drive I was feeling a ton of pressure and some sporadic, mild, contractions, but nothing strong enough to stop me from going about my day. At the appointment, I jokingly told my midwife, “I’ll probably see you again within 24 hours! I’m ready to have my baby!” Neither of us knew how serious I’d end up being.
Once I got home from my appointment I asked my mom to come to the grocery store with me, because I wanted to be extra prepared. We took the boys with us, which turned out to be a total shit show. They were all over the place, grabbing things they wanted, running off, whining and yelling at me-just being toddlers in a grocery store at lunchtime (honestly I know better). Looking back now it’s quite funny to me, and will make for a great story one day. I was definitely in the very beginning stage of labor while chasing my toddlers around a grocery store because I needed some last-minute things before the baby came. Mom life!
Once we made it home from the store, I gave the kids lunch, then put Jax down for a nap. I asked my mom to hang out with Nash for a while so I could take a bath. I was having some contractions and felt like baby time was on the horizon.
I hopped into the tub, turned on my oil diffuser with some lavender, put my headphones in, and turned on some positive affirmations for labor.
After about 20 minutes I decided to get out and walk around. The contractions were still manageable, but were becoming regular and were growing stronger. I was pretty sure they were the real deal so I wanted to get everything ready.
Brett and I started to get things set up. I already had all of the supplies set aside, so it was just a matter of pulling some things out that I’d be needing in my birth space.
At around 3:40 I called my doula and my midwife to let them know it was time. Then I ran a fresh bath where I’d wait for everyone to arrive. Thankfully my mom was here so she was able to take over with the boys, Jax also happened to still be napping which worked out great.
Brett placed battery operated candles all around the bathtub for me, we turned out the lights, and I put my birth playlist (which was a few hours of continuous spa type relaxation music) on a portable speaker. For the next 30 minutes, I practiced my hypnobirthing breathing (in for a count of 4, out for a count of 8) through each contraction, repeating some of my favorite affirmations in my head.
The contractions were coming on fast, and intense, and I was getting very little rest time in between. I knew my baby was close. During this time I just totally locked in on myself, my breath, my body. I focused hard on my goal, while also reminding myself to surrender to nature and let things unfold without pressure.
At around 4:15 my midwife arrived and came in to see how I was doing. I told her things were getting really intense and they should get the birthing pool ready. She and Brett got to work right away at filling it up. At this point I waited in the regular bathtub, I had no desire to be out of the water at any point (minus the 6 seconds it would take to transfer me from tub to pool).
This is when things started to get tough, my doula was still about 10 mins away, so it was just me through these next contractions while Brett and my midwife were setting up for me. I focused all my attention on my breathing and kept reminding myself I was safe, and I’d be holding my baby soon.
Once my birth pool was filled (it took a little under 10 mins), my midwife came and helped me into it. At this point, my doula was arriving, and in great time, because I was now going into the “down” stage of labor, or as it’s more commonly known, it was time for the pushing!
This was the most intense part. I started off sitting up in the pool with my back leaned into the edge. But every time a contraction would start I’d slide down under the water from the intensity, and didn’t have the control I wanted or needed to get things done. So I switched positions and was now on my knees, with my chest pressed into the side of the pool and arms draped over the sides. This felt much more natural to me and so that’s how I stayed for the remainder of labor (which really wasn’t long lol).
Brett was standing on the side of the pool, behind me, and was pouring a steady stream of warm water on my lower back, which felt amazing. And my doula Ashley was in front of me holding my hand, giving me gentle reminders and encouragement. My midwife, Gabi, was also standing around the pool keeping an eye on everything. At this point the second midwife arrived and quietly slid into the room.
About 2-3 pushes into things I felt a ton of pressure, then a big pop! I looked down, confused, kind of expecting to see a baby, but nothing. I looked at my doula “What was that??!”. She calmly said, “your water just broke”. I had an epidural with previous births and didn’t actually feel the sensation of my water breaking. But wow, it was strange lol. However, it meant we were even closer, so I was excited!
Around this point, Gabi asked if I wanted to catch my baby myself. I told her that I didn’t think I’d be able to, my position would probably make it difficult to grab her with confidence, so she should do it. The next contraction came on STRONG, I let out a mighty roar. At this point “scream” just isn’t the right word. Mama was full animal now.
I bore down hard, and I could feel her moving down farther, so close now. I reached my hand down and I could feel the top of her head. AHHH I could FEEL the top of her head with my hand!!! This was a crazy surreal moment for me, I had never been able to do that in my previous births. Physically feeling her body, so close to being earth-side, gave me a massive burst of motivation. I wasn’t able to move her out on this contraction, but I told myself the next one will be the one. I took my short break in between contractions to catch my breath and mentally prepare for the next. I told myself, I’ve got this, I’m meeting my baby with this next surge.
I felt the wave of my next contraction beginning. With all of the strength in my body, I bore down, I yelled out. I kept one hand in my doulas, and the other cupping the top of my baby’s head. Then I felt her come sliding past my hand, my midwife caught her, and handed her back to me.
I laid back in the pool with her cradled my chest. She was here, I couldn’t believe she was in my arms. All the emotions came flooding in and I just started crying and shouting “I did it! We did it!” Brett came to my side immediately and started hugging me and stroking her head. We sat like that for a few minutes, taking everything in.
Once I got out my midwives helped me dry off, get into my robe, and get tucked into my bed. Baby girl had some skin to skin time with dad while they helped me get warm, and took my vitals. Then I took her and tried to breastfeed her a little. She latched pretty naturally, but she wasn’t overly interested in eating.
Next came the fun part, introducing her to her big brothers. Brett brought them into our bedroom where they came, very curiously, running up into our bed. They both stared at her with fascination. We spent some time hanging out as a family, laying in bed, and resting, as the midwives were cleaning up and doing some paperwork.
After about an hour everyone left, and we all just sort of hung out, relaxed, ate, cuddled. Eventually, we put the boys to bed and then crawled into bed ourselves. It was perfect. I could not have asked for a better experience or better people by my side❤️.
