Friday March 19, 2021 started out like any normal day in the Lawrie household. Six am wake up for mom, to enjoy a coffee and some quiet before the chaos of the day begins. Followed by the rest of the family getting up around 7, breakfast, cartoons, laundry, you know, the usual “stuff”.
By mid morning I started to notice I wasn’t feeling so great. A little queasy, a little fatigued, and overall just blahhh. I was sitting on the floor playing with my kids when suddenly a little queasy took a turn for full blown “wow i feel awful, and i think I may get sick!”. In that moment I noticed something else, something a little unpleasant and maybe even embarrassing for some, the way I smelled. More specifically, my armpits. Despite being showered and wearing deodorant, I could smell my own body odor, and it wasn’t pleasant. Immediately I knew something was changing hormonally.
I had one spare pregnancy test kicking around, so I went upstairs without saying a word and I took it. Rather than set it down and wait the recommended 3 minutes, I just stared at it. As usual, the pink “tester line” showed up first. For anyone who has never taken a home pregnancy test, 1 line shows up almost immediately. This is the test line, it ensures the test is working and also gives you a sort of comparison line to compare against the potential second line. Anyway, staring down at the test, one line comes up, I wait, I stare, my stomach does aerial gymnastics. Then I see it, the second line. As a few more seconds pass the line gets a little darker. I’M PREGNANT! But I don’t say a word.
With my first pregnancy, Brett and I found out together at the same time. So there was no “reveal” so to speak. Just happiness, and looking back I’m glad that we both got to experience that together. With our second we were a little more surprised. I took a test because of a late period and the moment it was positive I started screaming for Brett to come into the bathroom, where I shoved my freshly peed on stick towards him.
This time I wanted to do something different. But nothing cutesy or elaborate because A. It’s our third baby, I’m not telling my husband he’s about to be a dad, he already is one. B. We’re not cutesy or elaborate people. and C. I’m tired. I need something I can throw together with minimal effort.
Once I solidified my idea I head to the grocery store. I pick up 2 more pregnancy tests because I really wanted to be sure before I put this minimal effort plan into action. And I also picked up a card from the sympathy section. Now some of you may find this in poor taste. Using a sympathy card to tell your husband you’re pregnant? And to those people I’d like to extend my sincerest apologies…..for your stale sense of humor.
The front of the card said “You can do it”. The inside read “Keep smiling. Keep looking up. Keep moving forward. Someone as incredible as you has everything you need to get through this.” It was perfect. So I taped the positive pregnancy test to the inside and presented it to Brett along with a case of beer (figured he was gonna need them!).
I didn’t think I’d be nervous. However, once he opened the card I instantly started sweating and got dizzy. Sometimes my offbeat sense of humor doesn’t quite land the way I expected. The beads of sweat only intensified as I watched him read the card, flip it over, inspect it, and stare blankly at me.
“Did you get this at a joke store or something?”
Ok so the joke kind of landed, but the problem was that’s all he thought it was- a joke. After a minute of me reassuring Brett that I in fact peed on the stick myself, and it wasn’t the product of some “joke store”, it started to hit him. Then all the gushy, made for tv movie moments came. Hugs, kisses, tears… holy shit we’re gonna have 3 small kids, and more hugs. We were happy.
The rest of the day was rather uneventful and slow. Mostly just us trying to soak in and process our feelings. Me resentfully watching my husband drink a beer, realizing I’d spend another summer soberly sipping virgins. WORTH IT of course, but hey, a girl is allowed to be a little salty about having to turn down a spicy marg for the next 9 months!
But mostly, we were just happy, and grateful to be given this chance again. That my body gets to hold and nurture this sweet baby. That in 9 months I will meet yet another love of my life. This may be my third pregnancy but the sweetness of that first day never dulls. In fact it only grows.
Thank you for taking the time to read about how this journey began for us. I hope you’ll continue to follow along over the next several months, there’s plenty more to come!
Dana xo
