How To Survive Life with 2 Kids Under 2

So you found out you’ll be adding another baby to the family, Congratulations!

By now I’m sure you’ve already done the math, and have figured out exactly how close in age your little ones will be. Two under two, how in the world are you going to be able to handle it? If you’re anything like me, you feel like you are barely handling the one you already have. 

You may be a hormonal ball of excitement about all of this. Running around with happy tears streaming down your face, wondering who to share the news with first, already brainstorming names. And if that’s you-yes mama, celebrate!!

..But maybe you’re like me and you’re worried.

And perhaps those tears aren’t from happiness, but instead fear, doubt, and uncertainty. And that’s ok too. I promise it holds no merit over how much you will love that baby.

I don’t want to make light of this, it’s going to be tough. It’s going to wear on you and you’re going to be tired. I don’t want to downplay your feelings of fear, because they are completely valid. When I found out I was going to be having my second baby and my first son was only eight months old, I was scared. No, scared isn’t the right word, I was terrified. 

But I assure you, having two kids so close in age is not as tough as you may think! I hope once you reach the end of this post you are feeling much more confident about this, and you can see that life with 2 under 2 is surprisingly manageable!

A quick recap of the day we found out…

I had purchased a pregnancy test because the day before I hadn’t been feeling well-tired, nauseous, couldn’t sleep. And my period should have already arrived. But with that said, I still didn’t actually believe I was pregnant, or maybe I was blissfully ignorant. Either way, I didn’t tell my husband before I took the test because in my mind, I was only taking it to rule out pregnancy, not confirm it. 

Wrong, oh so wrong. 

Two pink lines popped up before I even had a chance to run out of the bathroom and pretend nothing was afoot. 

Oh no, oh no, sh*t! How?! Ok, I know how,  but we weren’t planning for this!

I yelled for my husband and he came running in, confused by my urgency.

Then I showed him the test. And he laughed, and he laughed, and he laughed some more. And in that moment all I could do was envision him bursting into flames. WHY IS THIS FUNNY?

It wasn’t funny then, but it is now. And it will be many years from now when I tell my little surprise baby all about the day I found out about him. So if you didn’t jump up and down and cry happy tears immediately, don’t worry, it’ll make for a good story one day. 

Ok ok, enough with that. Lets dive in. How are we going to make life more manageable for you with two little maniacs, I mean bundles of joy, under two.

#1 Lower Your Expectations

Seriously, this is number 1? Yes, it is, and for good reason. Your life for the first couple of months is going to be tough, or at least very busy. Motherhood will consume most of your time, if not all of it. 

If you were expecting to paint your kitchen cabinets or learn Portuguese while on maternity leave, you’ll likely end up disappointed. If you have big personal goals, let them sit on ice for now. Somedays getting your teeth brushed before 11pm is your biggest personal accomplishment of the day. And that’s fine. 

Your job is to be a mom, and to heal your body. And to take your time doing so.

#2 Schedule Help From Family and Friends

This may seem a little odd to refer to family visitations as “scheduled help”. But people are going to ask to visit, so why not utilize them at a time that works best for you, and ask them to lend a hand while they’re there? Trust me, they’re happy to help. And if they’re not, they probably shouldn’t be welcome to visit in the first place. 

Visitors, for at least the first month, should be helping as well as gushing over your sweet little squish. Even if that just means bringing a coffee or a frozen casserole when they come-both of which are beyond appreciated by a new mom. 

While I’m not so fortunate to have my family members live nearby because I moved 2,000 miles away from them to the opposite coast, on the other side of the border, for a boy (sorry Mom). I am fortunate enough to have my in-laws live a little over 2 hours away. 

So weeks before I had my second son, we made sure to sort of reserve them, if you will, to take care of our toddler once I went into labour. They volunteered to stay for a few days until we got settled in to which I said “ABSOLUTELY”. 

I came home from the hospital to a full fridge, a clean house, all of my laundry done, and a meatloaf in the oven. The funny thing about moms is if you leave them in your house unsupervised, they’ll usually do your chores.

Of course my own mom wanted to visit as well. So I asked her to come about a month after I had Jax. I wanted to put together a little birthday celebration for my husband so I needed extra help with the kids. She was happy to come and happy to help. 

It’s not inappropriate to ask your loved ones to come when it best suits your needs, so toss that idea out!

And wouldn’t you know it, left unsupervised my mom also did all the laundry in the house! Moms, 10/10 would recommend!

Now if you don’t have family or friends nearby, or don’t have extra hands available, don’t worry, these other tips will lighten the load, promise!

#3 Make Meals Beforehand and Freeze 

Get real, I barely have time to put together dinner every night let alone make EXTRA meals for dinners down the road. That was me. But trust me on this one. 

My biggest trick to doing this and not actually taking up a ton of extra time is by making a huge portion of whatever is for dinner each night and storing it. So for instance, when I made lasagna for my family, I made enough to feed half of Sicily but portioned out 2 extras for freezing. 

Don’t have the freezer space?

Ok, my best kept secret for low freezer space is…soup! Who doesn’t love soup? And there are a million varieties to make. Let it cool and freeze flat in zip lock bags, then you can stack them. You can store a ton this way and they’re so quick and easy to thaw and serve!

#4 Diaper Change Stations

If you’re in the same boat as I found myself in, you are going to have 2 in diapers, and probably for quite some time. That’s a lot of poo. 

Taking your kids to their room, to a change table is going to get old fast-especially if you’re doing it with two kids. And no one wants to leave a toddler alone while ducking away to change the baby’s diaper. My toddler could probably paint the entire house and flood the kitchen in the time it takes to change one dirty diaper.

My house is 2 stories, and I was not climbing one single step that wasn’t necessary until my perineum could stay fused without the aid of sutures. So I built a temporary daytime change station in the laundry room (just off the kitchen and living room). I stocked the cupboards with both kids diapers, wipes, diaper cream etc and organized it with storage bins. 

Trust me, if one area of your life stays organized, let it be the diaper change stations. The last thing you need is a sh*t show while you’re dealing with an actual sh*t show. 

I also kept a fully stocked change station in my room where the baby slept, and another in my toddlers room so I was always in close proximity to a diaper station!

#5 Grocery Delivery

If your grocery store offers this, use it!! It may cost a little extra, and you may not get to squeeze your own produce or hand select which bag of spinach will be thrown in your trash next week. But it’ll save you a whole pile of time and pieces of your sanity that would have been left in aisle 3 with the yogurt your toddler busted open on the floor. 

Unless of course your spouse offers to stay home with the kids while you go. In that case RUN woman, grab your bag and burn rubber. Roam free with a coffee in hand and do an extra loop around the block on the way home, because it may be weeks, months even, before you’re free again. 

If you do go with delivery, most of the time you can select a time frame for free delivery. It will be a longer window, say between 12-4pm. But if you’re going to be home, and its not urgent, you can’t beat it! 

Plus a lot of places you shop will actually offer coupons online that you wouldn’t have known about in store, so you’re actually saving money! 

Ok, I swear I don’t work for your local grocery store, I just can’t preach enough about how much this will save your soul.

#6 Baby Wearing 

This saved my life. Seriously. And it is the key to getting anything done. Newborn babies are naturally inclined to be close to their mom. They’re serious stage five clingers! So wearing your baby on your chest is a way to constantly keep them close while still having use of your hands.  

But wait. My baby hates when I put her in a carrier!

There is no one size fits all when it comes to baby wearing. You may have to do a little trial an error to figure out which carrier and style works best for you and your baby. And it may take some getting used to for the both of you. But it’s worth the little bit of effort. 

I found that my babies fussed for the first minute in a carrier. But after a little bouncing and gentle bum patting, they settled in nicely (and often fell asleep! Bonus!)

#7 Give Yourself LOTS of Grace

This may not sound like much of a tip or “trick” but believe me when I tell you it is essential. 

The days will be long, some seemingly never ending. The nights may be even longer. You may feel like you are failing more than you are succeeding, and you will have days when you’re barely keeping your head above water. 

But keep on kicking mama, it won’t last forever. Please know that your best is always enough! Forgive yourself quickly when you fall down. 

There will be so many good moments along this journey as well. Moments that will downright make you sob because your heart is overflowing with a love that consumes your entire being. A contentment that you didn’t know existed. 

That moment when your first born kisses your new baby on the forehead, points, and says his name. When he brings his new sibling his favorite toy to share-those moments will make your mama heart swell. Over time they will form a bond that not even you can understand. These things are pure magic. Cling to these moments. Let them live at the forefront of your mind, replay them more than you replay the tough stuff from the day.

Breathe, and be kind to yourself mama. You’ve got this!

Do you have any helpful tips for managing life with two kids under two? Let me know in the comments!